these past two nights i’ve been having the craziest dreams and it’s probably due to exhaustion and a billion thoughts i have in my mind. but my body has been too tired for me to stay awake and think about these thoughts. so instead, i dream. last night in particular was the craziest dream i’ve had in a while. by crazy, i mean it felt so unbelievably real. it’s like all of my past, present, and future realities colliding into one vivid, loud world. last night i missed out on a couple friends’ events due to physically not being able to make it and other priorities. i spent the night catching up on sleep and as the night progressed, i started transitioning into a different world.
it was one big party, and as i made rounds at the party, i basically saw everyone from my childhood to present and maybe a couple people i’ve never met. i felt like i was being tossed around the party, but it was fun because everyone i knew was there and i was thinking like i would think if i were conscious. sometimes, i feel like my life is a dream. did that really happen kind of shit always happens to me. maybe i’ve been letting my subconscious speak more and simply go with the flow nowadays. i wish i can record my dreams and play it back. i never woke up feeling… awake. honestly, life has been moving way too fast for my liking. i’m grateful for everything and all the opportunities coming my way, but my physical state is hitting a wall which is causing emotional stress. i will keep pushing though. anyways, not sure where i’m going with this, but i will take it as a sign to probably relax and enjoy every moment before it all becomes just a memory.